As we approach the end of the year, many people start thinking about their next steps for 2026. There are so many things we would like to accomplish in a single year—often things that usually take a lifetime. But why is that?

Every year, it seems we want to do more. However, when we look at the results, most people don’t actually achieve the long lists of goals they set. If you don’t believe me, just visit your local gym during the first week of January and then again in July. At the beginning of the year, everyone is motivated to adopt a healthier lifestyle. A few months later, that motivation has faded, and most people have stopped showing up.

Of course, there are many reasons why motivation fades. But I believe one of the main reasons is committing to too many things at once, without realistically considering our capacity. For example, in 2023 my plan looked something like this:

• Get the B1 German certificate
• Get a driving license
• Invest in real estate
• Run a half-marathon
• Get in shape and go to the gym three times a week
• Excel at my job
• Read at least 12 books
• Travel twice
• Get a work-related certification
• Spend time with family and friends while doing all of the above

Looking at this list now, it’s clearly ambitious—and also unrealistic. By the end of the year, I had achieved only three of these goals, and most of the remaining items were pushed into the next year. More importantly, the sheer number of commitments put me under constant stress. As the year went on, I found myself blaming myself more and more for “failing” to keep up.

Photo by Tara Winstead on Pexels

We need to accept a simple reality: as humans, we have limited time and limited capacity. We all have 24 hours in a day. On average, we need about 8 hours of sleep. We might convince ourselves that 6 hours is enough, but that’s rarely sustainable and often leads to burnout. Most of us also have jobs that require 8–9 hours a day.

That leaves roughly 7–8 hours. If we spend around 2 hours eating and spending time with family, we are left with at most 5–6 hours per day. Over a week, that’s about 35 hours—including weekends. Excluding weekends, it’s closer to 25 hours.

Now consider just one goal from the list: running a half-marathon. Depending on your fitness level, you’ll need to run at least three times per week. Each session easily takes 1.5 hours when you include preparation and recovery. And running is relatively simple—you can just change clothes and go outside. If you replace that with going to the gym, you also need to account for commute time.

“When everything is important, nothing is. When you have many priorities, you effectively have none.”

Having many priorities is the same as having no priorities at all. A priority implies focus. But if you have ten things to focus on and only a few hours per day, you end up spending 20–30 minutes on each—far too little to make meaningful progress on any of them.

What I’ve learned is that it’s still useful to start with a long list like the one above. But after writing it down, we should ruthlessly review it and reduce it to at most three priorities. Having too much on our plate doesn’t motivate us—it overwhelms us. Over time, that pressure can quietly turn into stress, self-blame, and eventually burnout.

A useful question I now ask myself is: If I could only make real progress on one or two things this year, which ones would truly matter? Everything else can wait—and that’s not failure, it’s clarity.

In a world where everything is digitalised and every direction you look offers a tiny hit of dopamine, doing the Dopamine Detox December challenge has been far more difficult than I expected.

Since the beginning of the month, I’ve stopped doing many of the things that used to fill the gaps in my day, including:

• Using social media
• Consuming news
• Watching video-streaming services (YouTube, Netflix, Amazon Prime, etc.)
• Listening to dance or high-energy music

In short, anything that triggers a fake dopamine spike.

The first few days were surprisingly interesting — and honestly, quite difficult. On one of the first days, my wife handed me her phone to show me a photo. After looking at it, I instinctively closed the Photos app and opened Instagram on her phone without even thinking. A few milliseconds later, I realised what I was doing and closed it immediately.
Another time, during a lunch break, I still had 15 minutes left and automatically grabbed the remote to open YouTube. Again, I caught myself and closed it.

Photo by Christopher Ott on Unsplash

These are the habits so many of us have unconsciously developed in recent years. The rise of social media has consumed everyone’s time — but that’s a cliché, so instead let me tell you what actually happened:

I’m only 11 days in at the time of writing, with 20 more days to go. My observations are incomplete, but I’ll likely publish a follow-up post once the challenge is finished.

The First Two Days Were the Hardest

I was behaving like someone addicted to more classical addictions such as alcohol or drugs. I felt unfulfilled, overwhelmed, and constantly bored. It was strange to sit in the living room after dinner and realise I had “nothing to do.” But as Charles Duhigg explains in The Power of Habit, quitting a bad habit requires replacing it with a new one. So I tried replacing YouTube and Instagram with books. I know that might sound boring — but bear with me.

Life Felt Boring at First

My brain was asking for dopamine every other minute. According to Screen Time on my iPhone, I picked up my phone more than 85 times during the first days — only to lock it again because there was nothing left for me to do with it.

I started reading more (I already read before bed, but rarely during the day). However, after 10 minutes, I would feel unusually tired or sleepy. The moment I started reading, every thought in the universe seemed to enter my mind. I pushed myself to keep going, but eventually realised I was simply skimming the text.

By Day Five, I Finally Settled Into Reading

My relationship with books improved dramatically. I was able to read for an hour per day, fully focused. My brain realised there was no more artificial stimulation available and had to find a new source of joy. Fortunately, I was reading a novel — not a technical book — which made it easier to stay engaged and actually enjoy the experience.

I Increased My Running and Walking Sessions

Reading became more satisfying, but I still needed more sources of joy. So I decided to increase my running sessions to boost serotonin, and I also began going for a 30-minute walk right after work to create a clear reset between work and personal life.

I Read Three Books in 10 Days

This was mind-blowing for me. My daily screen time is now less than an hour (down from 3.5 hours). I spend around two hours a day reading. I finished three books and am now reading a non-fiction book that requires much more attention. My brain loves it and wants to keep going.

I also realised something important: I was skimming far less than before. I could actually focus. I still get distracted occasionally, but it happens much later than it used to. When I do get distracted, I simply do five push-ups, take a five-minute break, and return refreshed.

ChatGPT Was Surprisingly Helpful

I always say that if there’s one thing ChatGPT already replaces effectively, it’s consultancy — especially when it comes to life-improvement strategies. Every evening, I shared my progress, and the feedback helped me stay consistent for the last 10 days.

I Still Stayed Aware of Important News — Through My Wife

At the start of the challenge, I asked my wife to tell me if anything important happened (either in Berlin or in the world). Even though I didn’t check any news sources myself, she kept me updated during breakfast whenever something meaningful was happening.

Final words

I’m still early in the journey, but these first 11 days have already shown me how different life feels without constant digital stimulation. Whether the effect lasts or not, this experiment is teaching me a lot about my own habits — and that alone makes it worthwhile.

Photo by Aakash Dhage on Unsplash

We have different campaigns for different months of the year. One of the most famous ones is No-Shave November, a fundraising campaign that raises awareness and funds for cancer research. There are many others as well, such as:

• Autism Acceptance Month
• Mental Health Awareness Month
• HIV/AIDS Awareness Month

Today, I want to propose a new campaign: Dopamine Detox December — a month dedicated to reducing overstimulation and reclaiming attention.

Dopamine Matters

“Dopamine detox” is a popular phrase, but scientifically, dopamine isn’t something we can “flush out” or reduce directly. Dopamine is a neurotransmitter that plays a crucial role in motivation, reward, learning, and habit formation. It is always present in the brain.

The real issue is chronic overstimulation.

Modern digital environments — especially social media, fast-paced entertainment, constant notifications, and instant information — repeatedly trigger the brain’s reward system. Over time, this can lead to:

• Shorter attention spans
• Lower tolerance for boredom
• Difficulty concentrating on long-form content (books, deep work)
• Habitual checking behavior (scrolling without intention)
• Emotional fatigue and anxiety

Research in behavioral psychology and neuroscience suggests that frequent exposure to high-reward stimuli can reduce our sensitivity to lower-reward but meaningful activities (reading, exercising, long-term projects).

Dopamine Detox December is not about eliminating dopamine. It’s about reducing artificial reward spikes so the brain can rebalance and relearn how to enjoy slower, healthier activities.

How does it work?

During the month of December, we simply stop doing some things and do more of some other things.

What We Avoid in December

During the month of December, the idea is to reduce or pause the following:

• Social media: uninstall or sign out from all apps.
• News consumption: uninstall news apps and use browser/OS tools to limit access.
• Streaming content: limit TV or Netflix to a maximum of 30 minutes per day.
• Highly stimulating music: avoid energetic, high-dopamine tracks (normal or calm music is fine).
• Audio during walks: walking in silence improves mindfulness and reduces passive stimulation.
• Alcohol
• Smoking
• Junk food and sugary snacks

Each of these behaviors triggers fast, easy, and frequent dopamine responses. Taking a break helps reset your baseline.

What We Replace It With

Instead of passive or highly stimulating consumption, shift your energy toward:

• Walking and exercise: improves mood-regulating neurotransmitters and reduces stress.
• Reading books or listening to audiobooks: encourages deep focus.
• Helping your partner or family: builds social bonding and empathy.
• Cooking at home: especially whole, nutritious foods that stabilize mood and energy.
• Mindfulness or journaling: reduces cognitive noise and increases clarity.
• Creative activities: drawing, writing, coding personal projects, DIY, music practice.

These activities provide slower, more stable, and more meaningful dopamine patterns — the kind linked with long-term well-being.

What You Can Expect After One Month

After 30 days of reduced overstimulation, many people report:

• Improved concentration and ability to stay with tasks
• Lower anxiety and mental clutter
• Better sleep quality
• More enjoyment from simple activities
• Increased patience and emotional stability
• A reduced urge to check phones or apps
• Higher productivity and deeper work sessions

By the end of the month, your brain is more attuned to “normal” levels of reward again — which makes life feel calmer, more intentional, and more enjoyable.

Technical capabilities are important for any competent engineer or engineering manager. With strong technical skills, you can solve problems faster and stay on top of complex topics.

But being a manager is ultimately about soft skills: managing humans, resolving conflicts within a team, and providing growth opportunities.

One soft skill that people often underestimate is the ability to work effectively with different functions — especially with product managers. A strong engineering manager should not only work well with a highly skilled, experienced PM; they should also be able to collaborate productively with a junior, inconsistent, or less mature PM.

This adaptability is what separates effective managers from the rest. You don’t get to choose the skill level of your counterparts, but you can choose how well you work with them.

Cross-functional collaboration isn’t just a nice-to-have. It’s a core leadership skill. The more you can adapt your communication, expectations, and style to any product manager — regardless of their strengths or weaknesses — the more effective and productive your team will be.

News websites — and certain people — can make you worry about everything. The moment you open a news site or talk to them, you start feeling anxious about things far outside your control. Whether it’s new workplace rules or world events, many of these sources of information are unhelpful, if not harmful.

Of course, you can try to avoid such news or people. But there are three fundamental questions you can ask whenever you’re confronted with worrying information:

• Can I change it?
• Can I influence it?
• Can I control it?

This idea comes from the classic book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, where the author presents the famous Circle of Control framework:

Stephen Covey explains that there are many things in life we care about — politics, the economy, other people’s behavior, global events — but most of these lie outside our direct control. We might influence some of them slightly, but we cannot change them directly.

Covey also argues that the more time you spend worrying about things outside your control — like constantly checking the news — the more your Circle of Influence shrinks. Your attention gets pulled into areas where you have no power, leaving you with less energy, confidence, and focus for the things you can actually impact.

Covey’s main point is simple: We should not invest our time and energy in things we cannot influence or control.

Think less about things you cannot change, and more about things you can change or influence.

So, the next time you encounter bad news or a stressful situation, ask yourself:

• Can I control this?
• Can I influence it at all?

If the answer to either question is “yes,” then it’s worth your time and energy. If not, then it’s healthier to let it go and refocus on the things you can change — for example:

• Your health
• Your skills
• Your family
• Your mindset